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Sunday, July 27, 2008

Full English

Most English people know that the expression "Full English" refers to breakfast, though it is seldom, if ever, spoken. Words like "Happy birthday darling, can I make you a full English?" or "Lord, I'm starving, I think I will have a full English" simply do do not ring out around the suburban households of England every morning. In fact, you are more likely to come across the term on the menu of a café on the Costa Brava. In England, we would simply say "cooked breakfast".

Normally I settle for a light breakfast of tea and cereal, but sometimes after a very early start Rassing or Tetradding, I will indulge myself in a "Full English". As my runcible sister Lorenzo the Llama has been teasing me lately about my culinary habits, I thought I would describe my own ideal "Full English".

First, a nice cup of tea, preferably Russian Caravan from my favourite tea merchant, Mecca of Aberystwyth

Next, a slice of fresh pineapple

Third course a bowl of porridge, made with milk and water in the ratio 2:1 with sugar in, and topped with golden syrup and squirty cream

Cooked entreé, a grilled kipper (Loch Fyne kippers are especially tasty). The advantage of this course is that it fills your house with the delightful aroma of smoked fish for the rest of the day.

The main course. Going round the dish: mushrooms; fried bread (x2); fried eggs (x2); grilled sausages (x4); grilled bacon rashers, unsmoked, back (x4); fried tomato. Side dish: baked beans. Preparation of this requires up to half a bottle of olive oil (the fried bread and mushrooms soak it up beautifully) and so this is really healthy. Some would add a slice or two of black pudding, but I am not partial to this myself.

Finally, toast and Robertson's Golden Shred marmalade. If you have stolen a little pot of luxury jam from some restaurant, that is a satisfactory substitute. Washed down with more Russian Caravan tea


Anonymous Gourmand said...

What, burnt toast? !!!!

10:53 am  
Blogger Maalie said...

LOL! It's wholemeal toast!

11:05 am  
Blogger lorenzothellama said...

Robinson's Golden Shred ..mmmm ...
Toast ..mmmmm ...
porridge ..mmmmm ... but with squirty cream and golden syrup? Nah, yoghurt and honey!

Kippers stink the place out for days, as does smoked mackerel, and Peter's beloved sardines and pilchards!

Brilliant photos though.

11:24 am  
Blogger lorenzothellama said...

p.s. What's wrong with Yorkshire Tea?

11:25 am  
Blogger Merisi said...

So you swim in squirty cream and scrimp on jam? ;-)

1:45 pm  
Blogger Ex-Shammickite said...

I love kippers... speshly with some nice fresh bread and butter and a nice cuppa tea... but everyone else in the house dons gas masks when I cook them.
Perhaps it would be wiser to cook them outside... on the BBQ perhps.
But then the neighbours might phone the gas company and report a leak...

6:09 pm  
Blogger Ex-Shammickite said...

.... and that full English... do you intend to eat it with that HUGE spoon or those fancy grabber thingys?

6:10 pm  
Blogger Maalie said...

Lorenzo: Nothing wrong with Yorkshire tea. In Yorkshire.

Merisi: I'll have to go back to the restaurant and steal another jar!

Ex-shammickite: A pleasure to welcome a kipper-fan! The grabber thingy is just for show. I would pick up the sausage with my fingers of course.

11:33 pm  
Blogger simon said...

yes. My family are English and I know these breakfasts well.

12:21 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


4:04 am  
Blogger Kiwi Nomad 2008 said...

Oh my giddy aunt! And you mean to tell me you are awake enough to eat ALL that in the morning???

Actually, impressive post.. wonderful photos... great creativity... I just can't imagine eating it all!!

5:57 am  
Blogger Merisi said...

"Golden Shred marmalade" reminds me of the best Scottish orange marmelade I ever tasted, it was made with Seville oranges and whiskey! (Imagine, where my host got that delicacy: At the Vatican's underground supermarket! If that isn't enough to become a Roman Catholic, then what? *giggle*)

12:32 pm  
Blogger lorenzothellama said...

Merisi, there are many and diverse reasons to become a Catholic but I have never yet heard of a reason like whiskey marmelade! Perhaps I had better inform Father Harry!

8:03 pm  
Blogger Maalie said...

Simon: You mean convicts were given that sort of tucker?

Kiwi: Well, there is a little bit of "blogger's licence" there! I mean, I don't have all that stuff every day!

Merisi: You can actually obtain "gift packs" of little jars of marmalade with different types of whisky, though it is hard to tell the difference.

Lorenzo: I think Father Harry would be more interested in distilling the whisky off from the marmalade in drinking it neat :-)

10:16 pm  
Blogger simon said...

yes- convicts were british.

Sadly for me I have no family history of convict relations.

What about bread and dripping

12:12 am  
Blogger Kiwi Nomad 2008 said...

I have a family history of a convict...from Cork... stole copper... but I don't know if he ate marmalade or even porridge for that matter. ;-)

2:40 am  
Blogger Halfmom, AKA, Susan said...

gosh, can you even walk about after such a breakfast or do they have to roll you out the front door?

Clearly, breakfast, at least in the morning, is NOT my favorite meal of the day!

4:16 am  
Blogger simon said...

ps I am not a fan of pineapple or mango. We have them here in bucket loads.

I do like pineapple juice though.

My breakfast is:-

3 wheat bix with skim milk & maybe a tea spoon of honey.Plus cup of tea (no milk or sugar).

A small glass of real fruit juice (eg pineapple or orange)

and thats all.

5:53 am  
Blogger Ted M. Gossard said...

Now I could eat a breakfast like that if I were on a hiking trip like on your previous post, minus all the heights that is. Or active like you seem to be, Maalie. Then yes, I could eat a breakfast like that.

Fairly active in my work now, mostly on my feet all day. So I do like to eat something substantial in the mornings which ends up being bread and jellies with butter or peanut butter, and/or oatmeal.

8:05 am  
Blogger Ellee Seymour said...

I love fruit for breakfast with organic yoghurt and nuts. I also love organic wholemeal porridge with tangerines. But before any of that, I always start the day with a large mug of hot water and lemon which I find so refreshing.
I often prepare my sons a cooked breakfast, or something hot, even if it's just spaghetti hoops on toast, to kickstart their day. I wonder how many kids today eat boiled eggs and soldiers. If their mums work, they would hardly have time for this.

8:51 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

No Marmite?


10:03 am  
Blogger lorenzothellama said...

Gosh Simon, is that all you eat for breakfast? No wonder you are so slim.

Kiwi: So you are an Irish lass?

11:01 am  
Blogger simon said...

yes Lorenzo

lunch is a vegetarian roll with egg plant and black olives

12:47 pm  
Blogger lorenzothellama said...

And supper is a big plate of meat I suppose?

1:17 pm  
Blogger TCA said...

Merisi, Your marmalade would probably have had Scottish whisky (no 'e') in it, not Irish (with an 'e'). I am in Oban this evening and using this tenuous segway will have a dram to double-check the spelling.

Maalie, you are missing one key component to the genuine Full English - black pudding. I'm afraid you are disqualified.

Full Scottish for me tomorrow! And, by the way, the hotel I'm in serves it's porridge with a tiny jug of Drambuie next to it.


7:37 pm  
Blogger Lavinia said...

Ah, I see you enjoy Russian Caravan tea too!

I would be happy to tuck into any of these dishes, save for the fish. I know that the Brits enjoy fish at breakfast but I can't bring myself to.... I suppose because I was not raised in the tradition...?

12:30 pm  
Blogger bigbikerbob said...

Hi, I think better off families might eat the fish or perhaps those near the sea but over 50 years ago when i was young the Sunday b'fast was very similar although it was ALL fried in Fat. Had to have Mushrooms and Black or Hogs pudding too although i never saw or heard of any one asking for or eating toast on top of that lot.
PS Yes Yorkshire Tea

4:14 pm  

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